Hi thanks, and yes I need to hire a proofreader! I’m not an expert, but yes I believe there is a strong link between BPD and ADHD, especially in the impulse-control part of the brain.
As for your mother, I guess everyone is different. I certainly would never believe everyone with BPD is either completely bad or completely good. The mental illness will attach itself to whoever the individual happens to be.
The key is that you need to want to get better. Also I often find when some people talk of BPD they misattribute all symptoms to the “borderline” part of the diagnosis. However, it’s possible to have more than one personality disorder.
“Personality Disordered” individuals may have other comorbidities operating alongside BPD, such as Narcissistic personality Disorder, Antisocial Personality Disorder and Histrionic Personality Disorder. So in the case of your mum, it sounds like there’s very complex problems you’re dealing with.
If things are difficult, then “radical acceptence” and practising non-attachment, is the only solution that I’ve found that works.